Tag Archives: Morrissey

Between the Bookcases: Pre-Event Conceptual Art Happening: Hugging Will Self, fictionally.

Between the Bookcases Poster Official-page-001

To book tickets for this event go to –

http://ilfdublin.com/events/between-the-bookcases-a-celebration-of-writing-groups

A Janey Macken Street Exclusive:

Pre-Event Conceptual Art Happening

Hugging Will Self, fictionally.

bearhug

The BWG event, Between The Bookcases, in the International Literature Festival Dublin 2017, actually takes place at the same time as Will Self’s event at the Smock Alley Theatre on 24th May 2017 in the same festival.

By a strange coincidence, in 2014, Camillus John, writer and organiser of Ballyfermot Writers Group, had a story published in The Stinging Fly, literary journal, entitled, The Pervert’s Guide to Modern Fiction by Mrs Pimple, in which Morrissey gives Will Self a hug on International Men’s Day.  See the particular gobbet from the story in question pasted in below.

Morrissey hug

As an example of Irish hospitality at its finest, and also as a piece of modern conceptual art, Camillus John will send Will Self a fictional hug from Morrissey on the night of Will’s talk at the festival, by reading the relevant gobbet of prose from his story before BWG’s Between the Bookcases event. He will read this in private with, perhaps, other members of BWG, in Room 3 of the library at 5.55 p.m. Or read it fictionally.

Thus, in this way, Will Self will receive a fictional hug on the night from Morrissey via Ballyfermot Writers’ Group to calm his nerves and welcome him, experimentally, to Ireland (and the festival), before he goes on stage. A piece of conceptual art. A happening. As it were.

MOrrissey hug 2

However, as the act of hugging is a very private act, people can only attend this pre-event fictionally and cannot attend in person. How? They can do this by reading said gobbet of prose themselves at 5.55 p.m. on the night of the event. In fact, they don’t even need to read it in actuality but can read it fictionally in their minds instead if they wish i.e. pretend they’d read it at 5.55 p.m. on the night of the event. That would do too. The more people that are fictionally doing this at 5.55 p.m. on the night, then the warmer the fictional hug Will Self will receive.

i.e. Ballyfermot Writers Group plan to hug Will Self in fiction through Morrissey at the upcoming International Literature Festival 2017.

This is an attempt to answer the questions; What is fiction? What is reality?

 

The gobbet of prose in question is as follows.

 

The Pervert’s Guide to Modern Fiction

By Mrs Pimple

 Written By Camillus John

International-Mens-Day-Header

NYE 3 pm: Why did Will Self write Autobiography by Morrissey?

‘The horrors of my private education, Mrs. Pimple, made me feel like running up on stage and hugging. Close, very close. To get some release. The bouncers offered no resistance. I was now up on stage with both arms spread out like aeroplane wings ready to clasp Morrissey to my bosom.

‘The stage lights flashed rainbows as I moved slowly towards him. The instrumental break was fast approaching and I’d use this opportunity to hug and then go; without as much as causing a spilt lyric or a dropped note. That was the plan. Then I’d melt right back into his audience Mrs. Pimple. That was the complete plan. Full stop.

‘I reached the singer and went in for the two second hug. And was hugged back. But pop went the weasel in both my arms at that point. Crackety-crack. We locked in spasm. I couldn’t untangle, rigidly enclosing the singer who tried to finish the song as best he could, deep now in my awkward embrace.

‘The bouncers came flooding but the singer stopped them. He understood that this was an osteopathic mishap. Perhaps more. The singer and I exchanged words as the band played on in the background and the stage lights wrote fiction in colour on our faces.

‘This was the last song in the encore, so it mattered little in the great scheme of things; everyone had already received their evening’s worth. Perhaps more. The band stopped and the audience stood in silence watching, aching, unable to leave. All I had to do was wait. It would unravel itself, this most un-Gordian of knots.

‘Five minutes in, and still our hug held sway, alongside the audience’s silent participation, when up piped Morrissey:

‘Only an Irish singer-songwriter can save us now!’

‘With that, Damien Dempsey sprang up from stage left like popping toast with a tuned-up guitar primed and ready to go off. He sang about not letting all those negative vibes and comments get in on top of you and doing damage.

‘Everything loosened Mrs. Pimple. Everything released. I wrote Autobiography by Morrissey, written by Will Self, right there on stage. It was quite charming. And liberating. The first men’s liberation day proper in my book.’

 

happy cat

Rik V

Coddle in Space now available to read on Headstuff.org!!!

Pigs in Space

Remember the Pigs in Space section on The Muppet Show?

Yes?

Great.

Miss Piggy

Well, prepare thyself for the Irish version,

Coddle in Space.

If you’ve ever wondered what coddle on Mars would taste like, then wonder no more my friends.

Space+sausage

Read my flash fiction of the Sci-Fi now on Headstuff!!!

In their Shot of Science Fiction Series.

Click the following link –

http://www.headstuff.org/2017/03/whos-afraid-coddle-science-fiction-short-story/

Spock Space Sausage

(and don’t forget my Type 2 Amber Brains from earlier in the year as well!)

http://www.headstuff.org/2016/12/type-2-amber-brains-short-story/

LIVE LONG AND PROSPER.

Are you gonna bark all day little doggie or are you gonna bite?

happy cat

Rik V

I told yiz Damo was a poet. Naaah nah nah naaah nah

taunt

Remember when Damien Dempsey was just a singer-songwriter?

damo ballymun

Neither do I, because I always thought he was a poet from day one.

But yis wouldn’t believe me, would yis?

hipster 2

Well it’s official now boys and girls.

Damien Dempsey  is a poet.

Full stop.

Read it and weep.

weep

Right here.

http://davelordanwriter.com/2015/02/01/what-is-an-irish-poet-2/

It takes one to know one.  And another poet has done exactly that.

A quite eminent one to boot.

Dave Lordan.

malevich

So yiz can stick that in your ipods and press play.

Not shuffle though – Jesus no –

You must  listen to the running order on each album as God (Damo) intended.

Anyway, as long as I’m proven right I’m happy. And I have been.

cat smile

See Ma? it does sometimes happen!

Mrs doyle

In summary –

hope

________________________________________________________________

And here’s a few more poets that the well-fed and funded cultural elite

won’t allow themselves call poets

that the Bogman didn’t mention –

(Just off the top of my head like)

Morrissey

Morrissey

Mark E. Smith

Mark E. Smith

Patti Smith

Patti Smith

John Lydon

John Lydon

Poly Syrene

Poly Styrene

Paul Heaton

Paul Heaton

Bono

Only messing with that last one. Ha.  Ha. Of course, that’s Janey Macken Street’s tax consultant.

And a great one at that. Highly recommended.

Really looks the part, don’t you think?

Frankly David Cameron since you ask

If David Cameron likes The Smiths

http://www.theguardian.com/theguardian/shortcuts/2015/jan/11/how-did-smiths-help-salford-lads-club-make-16000-one-week

– look he’s got the T-shirt –

 cameron smiths t shirt.jpg

then does that mean that Enda Kenny

is a Damo fan?

enda-kennyDamo

Heaven knows I’m miserable now.

miserable

As Jonny Marr said –

j marr

“Frankly, Mr. Shankly, since you ask
You are a flatulent pain in the arse
I do not mean to be so rude
Still, I must speak frankly, Mr. Shankly.”

The Pervert’s Guide to Modern Fiction and The Stinging Fly

Sting

A fiction of mine, entitled, The Pervert’s Guide to Modern Fiction, will be in the summer edition of The Stinging Fly!

More info available here –

http://www.stingingfly.org/issue/summer-2014

Have you ever wondered about modern fiction?

And, like me, have you ever suspected that there’s something not quite right with it , that you just can’t put your finger on?

The journalist Mrs Pimple has done  the research.

So Neo –  are you going to take the red pill or the blue pill?

morpeus

Take the red pill and read Mrs Pimple’s Pervert’s Guide to Modern Fiction in this summer’s The Stinging Fly. Out now.

The question is –

eyes popping

 

Can you handle the truth?